When a second family is formed, do the child support obligations change?
Support payors who remarry want to reduce their payments because they have new obligations. When the support recipient remarries, the payor wants to reduce the payment because there is a new wage earner in the recipient's household.
However, the basic answer is that there is no change in the amount of the payment.
The payor who remarries knew of the existing obligation when they entered into their new relationship. Therefore, even if children are born into the second marriage, that is not a basis to have payments for the older children of the first marriage reduced. Further, just because the new spouse earns a large salary, that is not a basis to have the child support payments increased.
If the recipient of payments remarries, the payor often believes there should be a reduction because this new spouse who now lives with the payor's children will help support their children. The new spouse has no legal obligation to do so and even if the recipient now lives in a palace, the natural parents have the obligation to support their children.
Therefore, remarriage by the divorced parents does not change their financial obligations to their children and all parties should keep this in mind before entering into new relationships. Do not rely upon courts to provide relief if you have taken on more obligations than you can comfortably handle.
Harold I. Guberman, JD
GubysLaw@aol.com
http://www.stepfamilyresourcesoflongisland.com/
A collaboration of independent practitioners committed to addressing the concerns of families dealing with issues related to being in a stepfamily.
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Stepfamilies and Discipline - A Joint Effort
One of the most challenging issues for stepfamilies is the issue of discipline.
Who should discipline whom?
Should the biological parent handle the task with his/her children?
What is the role of the step parent?
What happens when the dreaded statement comes: "You are not my parent."
I believe that the answer is simple although not always easy to do:
All discipline needs to be a joint effort. Although there are exceptions, most issues do not need to be decided in the moment. In order to avoid any manipulation or attempts to split the couple, it is helpful to have an initial family meeting in which both parents together explain to the child or children that while they are used to rules and consequences being applied by the biological parent, this family will always involve both adults in any decisions regarding the children. The hard part is not reacting in the moment when a child behaves in a way that seems to necessitate some response other than to say I will talk to the parent who is not present and we will let you know together what we have decided.
Of course, it may be difficult for both parents to agree just as in a family with both biological parents, but it is very important those discussions take place separately and the adults present a united front when presenting their decision to the children.
Victor J.Goldman LCSW-R
http://www.suffolknymarriagecounseling.com/
http://www.stepfamilyresourcesoflongisland.com/
Who should discipline whom?
Should the biological parent handle the task with his/her children?
What is the role of the step parent?
What happens when the dreaded statement comes: "You are not my parent."
I believe that the answer is simple although not always easy to do:
All discipline needs to be a joint effort. Although there are exceptions, most issues do not need to be decided in the moment. In order to avoid any manipulation or attempts to split the couple, it is helpful to have an initial family meeting in which both parents together explain to the child or children that while they are used to rules and consequences being applied by the biological parent, this family will always involve both adults in any decisions regarding the children. The hard part is not reacting in the moment when a child behaves in a way that seems to necessitate some response other than to say I will talk to the parent who is not present and we will let you know together what we have decided.
Of course, it may be difficult for both parents to agree just as in a family with both biological parents, but it is very important those discussions take place separately and the adults present a united front when presenting their decision to the children.
Victor J.Goldman LCSW-R
http://www.suffolknymarriagecounseling.com/
http://www.stepfamilyresourcesoflongisland.com/
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